


The Original Peen Lamp Drabble

by endlessnightlock (Endlessnightlock)



Series: My contributions to the Penis Lamp Drabble Series [1]
Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M, Katniss is confused about the lamp folks, So now this trainwreck is on Ao3, The Penis Lamp Drabble Collection, This is where it all began, lol, the lamp is a thing of glory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:08:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22486105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Endlessnightlock/pseuds/endlessnightlock
Summary: Posting this piece of fine art onto Ao3 for your continued reading pleasure, because we all know how things disappear from Tumblr sometimes :).Summary: Peeta isn't sure if there's more going on between Katniss and Gale than friendship, but a thrift store purchase by the unrequited-love-of-his-life sets his mind at ease.
Relationships: Johanna Mason & Peeta Mellark, Katniss Everdeen & Gale Hawthorne, Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark
Series: My contributions to the Penis Lamp Drabble Series [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1618318
Comments: 27
Kudos: 33
Collections: Eggplants Peaches Cacti Oh My! (or The Lamp that led to one thing then another)





	The Original Peen Lamp Drabble

**Author's Note:**

> So guess what, we're putting the entire Penis Lamp Drabble Series on the Archive, to preserve for posterity's sake. There is a picture of the lamp hanging out towards the end of the story so be forewarned.

“Think those two are fucking?” Jo asked nonchalantly, crooking her thumb towards the door that’d just closed mere seconds ago behind the girl of my dreams and a certain guy she spent a lot of time with- the one I wished would drop off the face of the earth.

“Who?”

“You know who,” she said.

Unfortunately, I knew exactly who Jo was talking about. Katniss and her usual companion- tall, dark, and moody Gale Hawthorne. Officially her “hunting partner” but what Jo was insinuating…

_Damn_ , _I_ _hope_ _not_ , I thought, shooting Jo a dirty look.

The two of us have never spoken of my unrequited love for Katniss. It’s existed since my first day of preschool and I’d always assumed- since it’s been going on for the last thirteen years- that it no longer needed to be acknowledged out loud. I assumed the moony look on my face whenever Katniss was around made my feelings obvious. 

I thought they all knew I was a goner for her by now.

“I don’t think so,” I said warily.

Jo just raised her eyebrows and took a drink of her soda.

_Fucking Gale Hawthorne._

Katniss says that Gale’s just her friend, but they do spend a lot of time together. And I mean a lot- alone in the woods for several hours at a time, at least a few days a week. I’m glad she has someone to help keep an eye out for her- just because I’m too big of a wuss to tell her how I feel doesn’t mean I love the idea of her being out alone.

I just wished I knew what was going on with her and Hawthorne.

* * *

  
  
  


The next morning, Saturday, I heard my phone ping with a round of texts from Jo.

**J: I think you’re still in virgin territory with Katniss.**

What the hell was she talking about?

**J: She brought over this lamp to show me- she picked it up at the thrift store last night, and lmao Katniss was so proud of it… said the mushroom design would go with the woodsy theme of her bedroom.**

**J: She didn’t understand why I couldn’t stop laughing at her.**

Underneath the last message was this horrifying picture:

  
  
  
  


**P: Those are penises.**

Thick, veiny, penis-shaped mushrooms (? seriously? How did Katniss not know what a dick looked like?) like some nightmare straight out of Larry Flint’s Hustler mansion in the 1970s. I mean, I assumed that was the only place a lamp of that phallic glory belonged.

**J: A whole fucking flock of them.**

I burst out laughing with pure relief. 

If Katniss couldn’t tell those were penises, I guess that meant she’d never seen a real life one, which meant she wasn’t messing around with Hawthorne.

All of those facts combined meant that I still had a chance to tell her how I felt.

**J** : **You’d better get your shit together and talk to her before Gale shows her the old Shitake- if you know what I mean.**

_Yeah Jo, I know what you mean._

**P: Thanks for the heads up. I owe you one.**


End file.
